A Scientist at the Movies Reviews by Greg Paris

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Title: The Wild Wild West

Date Viewed: 7/4/99

Details:

Will Smith

Kevin Kline

Kenneth Branagh

Salma Hayek

Director: Barry Sonnenfeld

Score: -

The Review: James Bond on speed, transformed into post Civil War cowboy country, with a stuttering plot paced to rap lyrics. And that was just the trailer. Sadly, the full-length event offers little more.

Will Smith and Kevin Kline reprise the roles created by Robert Conrad (as James West) and Ross Martin (as Artemus Gordon) in the late 1960's TV series. At the time, following quickly on the early Bond phenomena, Martin (now Kline) plays Q to Conrad's (now Smith's) Bond, coupling a fascination with steam powered gadgets (after all, it is the 1860's) and elaborate disguises with the (sometimes) suave and debonair (but seldom) secret agent.

This time, the problem revolves around a grudge match catalyzed by a Civil War rout, a mad scientist keen on providing the means to settle the grudge (and stealing world-famous scientists and engineers to accomplish this), and a threat on the Presidency. This is set against the scenery of the southwest desert, with occasional excursions to Louisiana and Washington DC. The speed of travel seems inappropriate to the times, but such details are lost among even greater faux pas.

More than a chamberpot of suspension of disbelief is required to watch this movie. Watching the "Tarantula" makes me scream for materials engineers (strength of materials and finite element design), experts in boiler design and firing (you would need an artificial gravity field to keep the boiler fired and drawing), and control theory (autonomous AI control of arachnoid leg movement just wasn't this advanced during the Reconstruction). There is a similar misplaced fascination with magnetism that seriously overestimates the field-strength of Victorian non-rare earth magnets. And you are given ample time to worry about such things because the plot, such as it is, does not offer much nuance or complexity to draw your attention from such wool-gathering.

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